Hermit 2.0

Individual, one-to-one connections are what I want out of and what I want to put into a community.

That's the only real value I can give and it's the only value I seek.

I'm not a community leader.

I'm an individual person going somewhere. And I'm doing the best I can to learn and grow and be true to myself along the way.

There are a few people who will travel with me.

And for me that is enough.

The new album

I've been thinking about what it was about NodeConf that had me a little anxious going into it.

Was it my fear of looking like an amateur developer? Not really. Was it worrying about camping with two small children? Nope. (They did great!) And it wasn't even about the fact that conferences are socially overstimulating for me. (That's a guarantee for my introverted self.)

Then I identified the feeling: It was a tiny fear that maybe I had too high of expectations.

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Vagueness and values

How did you get here?

Erm, set aside the stork for now. I mean: how did you get where you’re at in your life and your career?

You probably have a pretty good story to tell about how you set out to do (a), but because of (b), you’re now doing (c), which you never could have anticipated.

No matter how many things you square or divide, there’s no Pythagorean theorem for triangulating your way through life.

Unexpected things happen.

Gut-punched or overjoyed, grieving or grateful, we adjust and move ever forward.

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I woke up in a Los Angeles hotel bed in the early hours of last Tuesday and picked up my phone to see it was 5am and I had a new email from an old friend.

Of course I opened it.

A minute later, I was crying. A week later, I'm still heartbroken over it.

And wrestling.

The email provided a visceral reminder that people will vividly remember the day you broke their trust--and your perspective won't matter the slightest in their mind. It provided another reminder as well: when people are involved, there's no such thing as a business decision that isn't also personal one.

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